People I'm Next To

I'm next to this absolutely amazing guy. Our time near each other is short, too short. He is a little overweight and is wearing an baggy T-shirt with what I think is a Insane Clown Posse logo on it. His shirt is complimented, as ICP shirts often are, by gross and skimpy mustache. Based on his musical taste, and his facial hair I would put him around 16 or 17. He is enjoying a warm afternoon on his BMX bike, out for a ride with a 4 foot snake wrapped around his neck. In case I buried the lead too much here, let me rephrase: I JUST SAW A CHUBBY DUDE WITH A SHITTY MUSTACHE RIDE A BMX BIKE BY ME WITH A FUCKING SNAKE WRAPPED AROUND HIS NECK! I have little interest in herpetology so I can't identify the type of snake, except to say it was big, green, and currently not strangling this magical man child. Although I can only assume that it could have done so easily, especially wrapped so luxuriously around his ample throat meat. Mind you I'm not questioning this transcendent jug...

I'm next to these people. Nine people to be precise, all of us morning patrons in a modestly busy coffee house. It's an almost eerily regular morning. For ease of reading, I'll make a roster: a dude in flannel shirt ordering and chatting with a pair of baristas, two folks just sitting and sipping on a couch, an older gentleman doing the crossword, two hip looking folks on their laptops, and some manic pixie lady with spiked hair and tattoos reading fucking Atlas Shrugged in a comfy chair. Its kind of like this place is full of extras on a movie set pretending to be how people are supposed to be at a coffee shop, all just waiting for the protagonists of the film to pop in a stir things up with some drama. That said, I'm not complaining, the oddly trope-ish surroundings make for a weirdly familiar and cozy backdrop for my morning. Although after a little bit I realize there might be a driving narrative here that I missed, a few of them in fact. To put is shortly, ever...