The Person I'm Next To Is Using The Food Pyramid To Slander

I'm next to this guy. He is pretty wild looking, white blown back hair, big white mustache, black and yellow windbreaker track suit, and a reed thin body. He looks like Mark Twain in a power walking bumble bee costume. Oh, and he has a whistle on, like a gym teacher or a high school track coach.
I'm gonna go with gym teacher, since he is by a group of 2nd or 3rd graders. We are in this gymnasium and he is standing by a group of kids who are learning about the food groups. There is another adult there managing the herd of kids as they wrap their little kid brains around balancing meals. Actually the kids are doing pretty well, and everyone is having fun and learning. Yay! Then Bumble Bee Mark Twain decides it is time for a clever quip.
"Fruit group, ha, thats the group I'd put Mr. Smith in. Right?," he looks at the other volunteer slyly, who in turn looks embarrassed at the brief bout of homophobia and looks downwards. Undeterred our heroic little Bee nudges one of the kids, "Right? I mean you guys know what I mean."
Since they are little kids, they in fact do not know what he means, and instead confront the puzzle of the tomato. Fruit or vegetable, a mystery. Well not really, it is a fruit. The Windbreaker Bee man looks put out and with a dramatic briskness leaves the children, the other adult, and the tomatoes. I can hear his shiny pants swishing as he fades in the distance. Swish, swish, swish.
I wonder how the real Mark Twain felt about gay folks.

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