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The People I'm Next To Are More Attractive Than Me

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I'm next to some guys. Not only are they more attractive than me but they seem to have cooler interests than me. There are three of them, athletic, stylish men. It is likely they have abs. Two of them seem to be meeting the third to learn what he has to know about hiking and camping a certain area. Not only that, they seem to be bringing children along on their camping trip.
They probably volunteering to take orphaned children with chronic diseases on the only camping trip of their life. Something ridiculously noble and good. Maybe the reason they are so good looking is the light of their wondrously decent souls pouring out of them. Apparently, being a good human is a great workout regimen.
The gentleman offering advice seems to have worked in a hostel nearby the area of wilderness that the other two are going. They are flipping through a map book discussing which trails would be suitable for the youngsters. He has a encyclopedic knowledge of the area. He is smart too, I guess.
Seeing these shining examples of human beings should fill me with inspiration and hope for the entire race. Hearing them discuss their plans to educate and entertain children, pass on that glorious glow that seems to well up from the bottomless pit of their hearts, it should delight me. Instead I am annoyed.
Man, that one guy has cool hair.

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