I'm next to this guy. He has a baggy grey sweatshirt on, with a brightly colored t-shirt peeking out from the collar. It draws the eye to his neck, but once your eye is there you realize there isn't anything else to see. So I'm disappointed as I take in the rest of him. Which may be why I find this guy so unimpressive. Of course it may just be him being unimpressive. He has goatee, which does a poor job of masking a weak chin, a large reddish nose, and these squinted eyes that look like they are tearing up. He is sitting behind the counter at the gas station. In front of him is a box of brownies. These brownies are strange things, a bizarre point of advertisement.
They are labeled 'Relaxation Brownies,' and their slogan makes the claim, 'The only brownies specifically designed to calm you down.' The logo is a brownie with arms and legs lounging on a green divan. I suppose this green square where we find the brownie is laying on might be any other form of sitting/laying apparatus, but I don't care. It is a very luxurious brownie. Luxurious brownies lay on divans. I have decided that this is the case. I look down at the brownies, and then up at the teary dude, "Wierd brownies huh?"
"Oh I don't know, seem like brownies to me," he responds in a lazy voice.
Yes, they seem like brownies, on account of them being brownies, this is not what I was saying. But I let this correction blow past me. I do however feel the need to clarify, "I mean, it just seems weird. Who are they trying to sell these brownies to?"
"I wouldn't jump to conclusions," lazy voice again.
What does that even mean? What conclusion? I asked a question, that is the opposite of a conclusion. I look at him, confused, "I'll just get ten dollars on pump ten."
"Yeah, its a brownie laying down. On a couch or something," that damn lazy voice.
This is, amazingly, the most pertinent thing he has said. I know this is a small sample size of his speech patterns, but this guy strikes me as a factory producing non-sequiturs. I would hate to have to gather a larger sample size. I flee towards my car and the pump.
It is obviously a divan.
They are labeled 'Relaxation Brownies,' and their slogan makes the claim, 'The only brownies specifically designed to calm you down.' The logo is a brownie with arms and legs lounging on a green divan. I suppose this green square where we find the brownie is laying on might be any other form of sitting/laying apparatus, but I don't care. It is a very luxurious brownie. Luxurious brownies lay on divans. I have decided that this is the case. I look down at the brownies, and then up at the teary dude, "Wierd brownies huh?"
"Oh I don't know, seem like brownies to me," he responds in a lazy voice.
Yes, they seem like brownies, on account of them being brownies, this is not what I was saying. But I let this correction blow past me. I do however feel the need to clarify, "I mean, it just seems weird. Who are they trying to sell these brownies to?"
"I wouldn't jump to conclusions," lazy voice again.
What does that even mean? What conclusion? I asked a question, that is the opposite of a conclusion. I look at him, confused, "I'll just get ten dollars on pump ten."
"Yeah, its a brownie laying down. On a couch or something," that damn lazy voice.
This is, amazingly, the most pertinent thing he has said. I know this is a small sample size of his speech patterns, but this guy strikes me as a factory producing non-sequiturs. I would hate to have to gather a larger sample size. I flee towards my car and the pump.
It is obviously a divan.
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