This guy is sitting next to me and saying stuff. I'm outdoors in a chair. Oh right I guess I should answer him.
Okay, he wanted me to read his "philosophical treatise". Also, you should know that he had a violin case strapped over his back. He surprisingly doesn't smell like he's homeless so that was a bit of a relief. My guess is that he's a future homeless. Anyway, the universe is made up of spheres. That, and there is a potluck I should go to where I guess other people are free to invent incorrect ideas about things. I said I would "definitely not be there" and he said that that's fine because I could just play in the drum circle instead of talking about stuff. I also told him I would "for certain not play drums".
Then he took out his violin. I purposely avoided eye contact and at the same time felt the illness in my scrotum like I always feel when I'm about to be embarrassed for someone. He even said something like he was soon to try out for a philharmonic somewhere. Then something incredible happened: lovely music started playing… from the speakers in the shop. He didn't notice and it made his shitty playing even worse by clashing with a song in a totally different key. I went back inside a minute later.
Okay, he wanted me to read his "philosophical treatise". Also, you should know that he had a violin case strapped over his back. He surprisingly doesn't smell like he's homeless so that was a bit of a relief. My guess is that he's a future homeless. Anyway, the universe is made up of spheres. That, and there is a potluck I should go to where I guess other people are free to invent incorrect ideas about things. I said I would "definitely not be there" and he said that that's fine because I could just play in the drum circle instead of talking about stuff. I also told him I would "for certain not play drums".
Then he took out his violin. I purposely avoided eye contact and at the same time felt the illness in my scrotum like I always feel when I'm about to be embarrassed for someone. He even said something like he was soon to try out for a philharmonic somewhere. Then something incredible happened: lovely music started playing… from the speakers in the shop. He didn't notice and it made his shitty playing even worse by clashing with a song in a totally different key. I went back inside a minute later.
OSU Guy's first time, other people would make a virgin joke here, feel free to.
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